Please don’t like me

(posted on a busy forum)

It’s lovely to be liked, and I should really learn to do as the Romans do, but I just can’t like things I like.

I’m making a full confession now because I think it’s something anyone considering liking one of my posts deserves to know before they click.

Despite the thread title you can carry on liking me if you’re so inclined (like how I put that in bold?); the upside is that my guilt at not ever reciprocating in kind often compels me to put extra effort into a reply I might otherwise not have, therefore adding value to the franchise. You’re welcome, Admin.

As of the most recent accounting, I’ve received 287 likes. I would like to take this opportunity to donate these to a charity involving orphans and kittens and unclubbed baby seals. Or else they could be loaded up and fired into an unsuspecting crowd (love that illustration, which I grabbed from a story, since gone 404, called ‘How to get people to like you on Facebook in five simple steps’).

PS. Am anticipating the first reply: “No problem, I’m already not liking you.”

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One Response to Please don’t like me

  1. sam says:

    Likes are somewhat informative in that if you see somebody generally spreading the like, but they aren’t liking what you do, chances are that is an editorial comment on you, by omission. Which is fine; it merely confirms suspicions (most people not being aware of my feelings on the subject).

    Really, in the end, who cares.

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